The Blog
My random thoughts and musings during the PhD journey. Regularly updated by me (hopefully weekly). Rarely read by you (I know you're all here for the Excel tips.) In reverse chronological order, just like I like my unplayed podcasts (and if you want my podcasts recommendations, check out my Resources page.
Week 15 - Thankful - November 29, 2024
As we come off the Thanksgiving holiday, I am grateful for this new phase of life. Sara has been super supportive, and it is clear that even though financially we're in a bit of a different spot, mentally I am so much better. Past holidays at family have lately consisted of me wanting to totally relax, decompress, and not do anything. This year, we hosted family at our house and spent Thanksgiving Day at Sara's grandparents. I took the lead on most of the cooking and cleaning for both of those, which was both a gift to me and to family (well, unless they are just lying about liking the turkey!) It is a blessing to have the energy to live life in such spirits again!
Week 14 - In Too Deep - November 22, 2024
I am on a weekly research call, which is very cool as a first-year. I also have no idea how to do the regressions/analysis being asked, and I don't even know the vernacular to ask ChatGPT to create the code for me, or to speak intelligently about what I don't know in the calls. I have never been good at asking for help, and I'm not doing any better here, even though I have resources to help me. As a result, I put off the research until the last minute, making it even harder to do and creating a spiral downwards. The opportunity to do research early in the program is great. But if you're reading this blog in anticipation of starting a doctoral program in the future, I'd recommend being an observer/shadow on a research project as you're still even learning what a regression is!
Week 13 - What Did I Do? - November 15, 2024
Ever have a mini-existential crisis? I had one of those this week. I was reading a research paper and had a few issues with it.
The topic was pretty boring (even moreso than other papers I've read).
The results had me thinking "sure the data shows it, but there is no way this is actually happening. If it is, it's just a side effect and not actually happening the way it's presented in the paper."
I admittedly have a bias. I think that having work experience is critically important to research and being an effective professor. I am not saying it's vital, and there are certainly exceptions to that, but in most cases, your research and teaching are going to be more impactful if you have experience in the accounting world.
So I'm having all these thoughts, after a somewhat challenging week personally as well, and wondering if I made a huge mistake. I had a good-paying job that I mostly liked. I was pretty good at that job. Why did I throw all of that away for reading papers I don't like, taking classes that are getting monotonous, and dropping down a tax bracket?!
Those weeks are going to happen. It's okay to have doubts. It's okay to not like something 100% of the time. I have the long game in mind, and while it's a risk to get there, it was worth it. What's something you've been doubting lately? If you are confident it has a purpose for the future, let yourself doubt and ask those questions. You'll get there eventually!
Week 12 - Major/Minors - November 8, 2024
Did you know that in a PhD program, you can also have a "minor", similar to undergrad? For accounting, the normal minor is a general business or econ minor. Fortunately, there is some flexibility with that. We're still figuring out the exact classes, but I am super excited to get a psychology minor! I have a deep curiosity why people do the things they do, and why organizations do the things they do (beyond just making money). This should supplement my research interests in fraud, management decisions, and audit choices very nicely. Plus, knowing a bit more about how people think will hopefully help me understand how I think too!
Week 11 - Are We There Yet? - November 1, 2024
It's wild how quickly the semester is going (it's already November, and week 10 of this blog?!) but also feels like I'm moving at a glacially slow pace. We're hitting the point in most of my classes where all the foundational work we've been doing starts to show its applications for my future research. However, it feels SO slow. I don't want to speedrun through the fundamentals, but I'm ready to actually understand all the math/significance of the tables and analyses in the papers I've been reading, especially at conferences. And especially since I was asked to run my first regression on some data points - assuming I even correctly controlled for fixed effects (I didn't, and don't know what those are), I couldn't tell you if the regression showed anything important.
I don't like feeling like an idiot, but I look at almost all of these papers and it's like reading a foreign language. I'd like to just know the language!
Week 9 - Another Conference - October 25, 2024
I have been really fortunate in attending conferences as a new student. I was able to attend my second conference, this time at University of Illinois. The only bad thing I can say about it is the drive is long and boring. Otherwise, it was another great experience and a good reminder that I am in the right place!
I always enjoyed presenting in my previous career, primarily because I had a fantastic public presentations class in college. This conference got me super excited to present my research one day, hopefully sooner rather than later. Now I just need some research ideas...
On the classroom note, I got all of my midterms back and crushed each of them. It feels good to get tangible results in the form of a grade. That was always hard for me in the professional world - am I doing fine? Can I measure it better? Did I get an "A" on that last investigation? With tests, you get the immediate feedback, which I appreciate! And green check boxes on online homework is nice too.
Week 8 - It's Fall (Break) Y'all - October 18, 2024
It's fall break. Too often we don't actually take a break from work, so I'm updating this a week later and keeping it short. In the words of one of my favorite podcasts, take care of yourself, and if you can, someone else too.
Week 7 - The First Midterm - October 11, 2024
Fairly short update this week. I had my first midterm on Tuesday (stats) and think it actually went very well! But I have a couple of midterms next week (math and microeconomics) that I'm focusing on and not as confident about, hence the shorter post.
But in more fun news - we snagged last minute tickets to watch the Tigers play at Comerica Park for their last home game in the ALDS. The crowd was electric and the atmosphere would have been fire (I think that's what the kids are saying these days) had they won, but sadly they lost. In micro, I'm learning a lot about budget constraints (something about a Lagrangian method, but don't ask me what it really means). Something the economic models don't factor in is experiences. While it was probably not the smartest use of funds economically, especially since we still need a new fridge (where are the Samsung reps reading this site?), it was 100% worth the experience with my wife and dad!
Week 6 - Research Begins - October 4, 2024
In exciting news, I had my first call related to research, and it's fraud-related! I won't put any specifics yet, but at a high-level, my requirements are a first-year paper, second-year paper, and my dissertation. This is a great starting point for a first-year paper, so hopefully it puts me in a good position to hit the deadlines! I'm excited to build out the research tab of this website once I start having good ideas flow in. Again, if you have anything you'd like to see researched, shoot me an email!
Week 5 - Classes Are Real, but Life is Realer - September 27, 2024
I mentioned in my last post that classes were starting to get more challenging, but was trying to keep that in perspective with the challenges others face. Well, I'll add my own challenge to that list. On Wednesday, I managed to fall off my roof. Certain questions, such as "why were you up there?" and "was someone else home?" can be answered with "no good reason" and "no, even though I already promised my wife I wouldn't do that in the past", and we don't need to belabor the point here. However, I share this to say that with a fractured wrist, school becomes a lot harder because typing is a lot harder. Fortunately, it's my non-dominant hand, so I can still write (although now that I think about it, maybe that would have been a good excuse to get out of some homework assignments!) And also to say, life is more important than classes, or work, or most other things. Take care of yourself!
On a more upbeat note, I attended my first MSU football game as an actual Spartan. Hopefully, my dissertation committee in the future doesn't beat me down as bad as Ohio State beat us this weekend. As a lifelong fan, I have seen plenty of these losses before, but, as the kids say, as someone with a bit more skin in the game than I have in the past, this one hits diffy.
Week 4 - Classes Get Real - September 20, 2024
Up until now, most of the classwork has felt like review of stuff I had learned at one point, which was nice since it had been so long since I actually learned any of it. My professors warned me up front though, graduate level courses move quickly, and they have indeed! I'm trying to keep it in perspective though. Without sharing any personal details, one of my fellow course mates came from another continent, and had logistic issues getting in for the first 3 weeks of class. They finally made it, and talking with them is a reminder of how we're all going through challenges. I have an hour drive, which can be tedious. They came to Michigan after essentially 2 days of travel with no connections in the state and no easy method of transportation once they arrived (at least, until getting set up with a bus pass). Which is all made even harder when you consider that without an international phone plan, they couldn't even make regular calls or texts until they were able to get to a T-Mobile store (which again, hard to do without transportation). Going through all of that, plus the classes, seems like an incredible challenge to me. And yet I have only seen a smile on their face. Which again, brings it all back to perspective.
On the challenges note though and a bit more light-hearted, if you remember my first week's post about not starting house projects when you start school... I still can't figure out the outlet situation. I know in the services world you can get inexpensive, high-quality, and fast, but you can only pick two. But if you're reading this and have an electrician friend who is both high-quality (at least, won't burn the house down) and inexpensive (I am a college student after all), and maybe has a bit of time in their schedule in the next 2 weeks, I'm out of ideas!
Week 3 - First Conference/Workshop - September 13, 2024
I was able to attend my first workshop, a Corporate Governance-focused day where four different researchers presented some of their latest research topics. What I mostly learned is that you can have the greatest slides in the world, but you're not getting through them. Everyone basically gets five minutes to set the stage, and then attendees just rip you apart! In a good way though. They're just trying to poke holes in your paper to make it better for when you publish.
My other big takeaway is that networking is just as important in academia as it is in public accounting, and the accounting profs you had in college are way more fun than you thought. I had never been to Indiana University before this weekend. It's a beautiful campus, and the nightlife is pretty awesome, mostly thanks to a band called Rod Tuffcurls and the Bench Press. I can't remember the last time I had that much fun at a concert (well okay, I saw Taylor Swift in July in Zurich, and that is hard to beat.) I certainly didn't get any homework done, but an A on my stats homework isn't going to be the deciding factor in a job 5 years from now anyways!
Week 2 - Labor Day Weekend - September 2, 2024
Holiday weekends hit just as hard as they did in the professional world, except maybe even a little better when you're caught up on homework. Instead of stressing about a client meeting the next week or a silly deadline looming (there's no such thing as an accounting emergency after all), I truly got to relax at the cottage up north for Labor Day weekend. Often times over the last 10 years, these weekends have been overshadowed by too much drinking (again, I'm pretty open!) That seems to be a pretty common theme for the public accounting profession, as a way to escape the stresses of the job. I was encouraged by a lot of the younger staff coming into the profession, as drinking didn't seem to be as big of a thing with them; I'm hopeful that's a trend that continues for the profession. For me, over the past month, it's been very refreshing to cut back so much on drinking - I'm simply not looking to escape in the same way I used to. Plus, leaving home at 6:45 AM multiple days a week to get to class by 8:30 AM is a pretty good deterrent too.
The Real Week 1 - Syllabus Week - August 26, 2024
I have three classes this semester. Which doesn't feel like much, but it's been a LONG time since I was in a classroom. Even longer since I took any math/econ classes. I took Calc 1 and 2 my junior year of high school in 2008. I took multivariable calc my senior year, in the fall of 2008. Micro and macro were freshmen classes at Hope, so 2009. I picked up a stats class in my sophomore year of college to round out a math minor, but again, we're talking 2010. I haven't had a class like these for 14 years. So for me to pass Mathematical Applications in Economics, Microeconomic Analysis, and Statistical Methods for Agricultural, Food, and Resource Economists, I have a lot of work cut out for me. Fortunately, apparently the grades don't matter, as long as I maintain a 3.0 average. And my professors seem very helpful and invested in getting all seven of us students into a good position for future classes!
I did make the mistake of trying to start and finish a house project the day before I started... I can't learn how to do house projects apparently, but hopefully I can learn Econ and math!
And I get to wear my Dunks on campus, so that's pretty cool too.
Week "1 to 3" - Pre-Class Introductions - August 5, 2024 to August 25, 2024
After a short four days of retirement, I was on campus Monday, August 5, 2024 to get situated with a new shared office and new laptop, and to get to work. A common phrase I heard throughout the day and that week was "welcome to academia..." Unlike public accounting, where they have your laptop ready for you on day 1, badges printed, access granted, and all your HR paperwork in order, higher education is apparently a little slower. With no laptop, no keys, and no record even in the system, it was a slow start. My parking pass wouldn't be ready until the week of classes; I wasn't going to get paid until September 6; I didn't even have a student ID to start taking advantage of student discounts while I was earning nothing! Fortunately, we had a summer symposium for the next few days, for which I needed none of that. Just a willingness to learn.
From there, a day of orientation with the other first-year accounting student, and we were off to the races, tasked with completing our first replication. Essentially, any research paper you read has data behind it to support the findings. In theory, anyone with access to the data should be able to come to the same analytical results as the author. This turns out to be a bit more difficult than anticipated, but after a few weeks of learning SAS through a coding bootcamp, I was able to get pretty close to the results of the assigned paper. And though I've dabbled with coding in the past, primarily VBA for Excel, this was my first time really diving into a program.
There are a lot of positive indicators, and while I'm trying to keep it in check, knowing the grass isn't always greener on the other side (hehe, go green!), I am very excited for the next five years.
Just like in public accounting, free lunches are plentiful and quite enticing.
MSU has one of the top managerial accounting programs in the country, and I am the only current student with an interest in that area, which will bring a lot of opportunites. In fact, I have already been given the opportunity to attend a conference at Indiana University in mid-September to see one of the MSU professors present a paper.
I actually really like coding. I can't wait to understand the math and process, so that I can put my new coding skills to work solving problems.
Pre-Requisite Reading - Prior to the Start - 2013 to July 2024
How did I get here? After 10 years in public accounting, I hit a bit of a personal mental health crisis. I'm pretty open about it and always willing to answer questions. In short, I had hit a very low point in September 2023 and did a 2-week outpatient program at a mental health facility, working on coping mechanisms during the day while still living out my regular life during the evenings. It was at this point where I realized public accounting was not the end goal for me. I had a great team. I loved the type of work I was doing (there isn't much more exciting in the accounting world than investigating fraud.) I was making really good money. The flexible time off allowed me to do a lot of travel with my wife. I mostly worked from home with my dogs. But I wasn't happy.
I don't know that this new career will make me happy either. But it's a risk worth taking. The best days of my public accounting career were the days I was participating in on-campus recruiting. There's something about a college campus that I find energizing. I always wanted to be a professor, and even had the opportunity to teach a class at my alma mater, Hope College, in the spring of 2024. I had always looked at it as a retirement gig, but had an epiphany during my low point - why wait my entire life to retire and do something I love?
That's when I started applying to PhD programs. As luck would have it, I was accepted to Michigan State University in January 2024. Graduating from high school, my top two schools were Hope and MSU. My entire family went to MSU, and I grew up going to football games (through the very bad and somewhat good years). This just felt right. So in April 2024, after many discussions with my wife, we decided it was time to take the plunge. We decided on a final end date of my public accounting career of 7/31, just shy of my 11-year work anniversary, and here we are today!